Finding an Unshakeable Home Within
Life has been a bit discombobulated lately – you may have noticed. It’s been hard to write, record, edit, and launch content because I recently made a life-changing decision to move back to my home state. I’ve been living out west for 20 years and after being back and forth, my heart was beginning to feel the pangs of moving closer to loved ones, and be witness to a new generation of family members that were growing up way too fast.
The decision to move had been brewing over the last few years. Maybe COVID had something to do with it. Or the state of our country – or my getting older and understanding the importance of connecting more closely with dear friends and loved ones. Whatever it was, the decision happened and packing began, and I traveled through seven states in two days and felt no regrets.
Much of my decision felt as if it was made without me. I would find myself in the middle of packing, making arrangements with a moving company, or speaking with friends about it and realize: I hadn’t made a choice to do any of it. Yet, I was fine that it was being done. I was being done. Packing and organizing and readying my life to move was being done. I learned quickly to just allow, surrender, and be guided instead of trying to orchestrate everything.
These were surreal experiences but I had been surrendering to the process of life; tired of being the one who always had to “fix, organize, and figure everything out.” It was as if the universe was gently saying we’ve got this – just follow our lead. A feeling of powerlessness emerged briefly but faded as I knew that what was happening was from love. When what is happening, or a decision that needs to be made arises and I weigh it on the scale of “is this coming from love or fear” it is easy to let my hands off the wheel when love is gently speaking.
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